Top Ten Signs You're Not Watching A Real Baseball Team

Top Ten Signs You're Not Watching A Real Baseball Team, courtesy of David Letterman.


10. You recognize batter as the kid who just sold you a hot dog.
9. Everytime a player slides into second, he busts his hip.
8. They keep shouting "do over!"
7. When umpire yells, "strike three," batter looks at him as if the dude's speakin' French.
6. Try as they might, they just can't scratch themselves like professionals.
5. First base: Siskel. Second base: Ebert.
4. Game stops when some lady in a house near the stadium shouts "dinner time!"
3. Players constantly adjusting each other's cups.
2. You overhear the coach yelling, "run Forrest, run!"
1. They play like the Mets.

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