Top Ten signs that your baseball team won't be playing in the World Series

Top Ten signs that your baseball team won't be playing in the World Series, as per David Letterman.

10. Team's idea of a double play -- bourbon with a beer chaser.

9. Home games played in parking lot of local bowling alley.

8. Players refuse to slide for fear of ruining their manicure.

7. Manager is in excellent shape from walking out to the mound after every pitch.

6. Players keep pointing at the bat and saying, "Is that some kinda ball-wackin' stick?"

5. Team uniforms are made from duct tape and bedspreads.

4. When team takes the field, more than a few are carrying folding chairs.

3. On pop fouls, catcher takes off his mask, jersey, socks,and pants.

2. You best hitter's nickname: "The Sultan of Suck."

1. Instead of tobacco, players chew asbestos.


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